WORDS FOR CHANGES

I remember there was a time were I stopped smiling. A time were it just did not feel right to me or better yet I felt like joy was nonexistent in me. From time to time... I gave people around me fake smiles just so they would not worry to much. But deep inside, I felt hollow, I felt empty and when I did feel something it was not good. So much has changed because of my journey and one of the biggest things has to be my smile. Best part is that its 100% legit. I dont have to fake them no more. I dont feel hollow or empty no more. Im full of self love, confidence, and determination. I feel like i finally found my purpose in life. Im not scared no more. 

If one person in the team is lacking then the whole team lacking. Surround your self with people who is energy vibes with yours. Surround your self with people who call you out on your BS when you slacking. If the people in your team do not make you want to step up your game then you playing in the wrong team.

I keep going because I know what it feels like to be the worst version of me possible. I keep going because I know what it feels like to be stuck in a place where depression and anxiety are you only companions. I keep going because I give myself no other choice. 

I know what I want out of life. Im ready to do whatever I need to do in order to reach it. The amount of work and time does not concern me. Big dreams takes big work and big patience. Im not just talking about the weight loss. Im talking about the big picture. With this new life comes new opportunities. Ones I ever thought could have. I plan to take advantage of everyone of them and build something of my own. My weight loss is the beginning steps into something bigger. 

There is no quit in me. No surrendering, no backing down. When things get hard, I remind myself "This is what you asked for" this is the life you decided to live. Its a battle on a daily bases, but even at my weakest I will hold my own. To be completely honest I love it. I love being in situations where im tested (mentally or physically), I dont want to loss this weight so I can have an easier life, quite the opposite. Im losing this weight so I can make my life harder. Im losing this weight so I can push myself harder. Im losing this weight so I can push myself past limits. I want to test myself. When I hit my goal weight and goal body then thats when the real fun begins. 

Not everyday in the journey is perfect. We going to have to go through those days where it feels like everything is working against us. But we have to stay focused, we have to stay calm, we have to stay collected. Understand its just part of the process. Understand that sometimes shit just happens. It may slow us down for a bit, but we cant let it stop us. Had a couple of set backs this past week, but im picking myself back up. Thats all this journey is really about. Falling down and getting right back. Growing strong with each obstacle and learning from each set back. Im grateful for the slips ups, grateful for falls, but more importantly Im grateful for the knowledge gained from going through those situations. Either we win or we learn a lesson. 

Never before have I been this hungry to reach my dreams. For the first time I actually feel like im living for something. When I wake up I feel like I'm living for something. When I wake up I feel like I have a purpose now. I love this new life style I live, but more importantly I love the person Im becoming. I trust myself, I believe in myself, and Im ready to bet everything on myself. Thats the type of confidence I have now. Its like a fire was lit in side me. it drives me even when I feel I have nothing left to give. Dont sleep on me my people, things are just starting to get interesting. 

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